18++ 12 Oct 2007

Sex education
A fifth grade teacher is told she must teach sex education to her class.
She decides to use a math technique to teach the subject, and thinks
flash cards will work well.

The next day in class, she holds up the first flash card, a picture of a
breast, and asked "Does anyone know what this is?" Little Suzie
responds-"I know, I know! It's a picture of a breast and my mommy has
two of them!" The teacher says "very good Suzie, you get a star for the
exercise"

The teacher grabs the next card and holds it up. It's a picture of a
penis. She asks "Does anyone know what this is?" and little Tommy says,
"I know I know! It a penis and my daddy has two of them!!!" The teacher
says "well Tommy, It is a penis but your daddy can't have two of them."

Tommy says, "sure he does, he's got a little one he pees out of and a
great big one he brushes mommy's teeth with!"

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JOKE OF THE DAY
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As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the
health zone by sharing a hearty laugh. A variety of jokes that are
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Wishing you a laugh riot.

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WORTH READING
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of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
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18++ 11 Oct 2007

Doctor Joe

Doctor Joe had slept with one of his patients and had felt guilty all
day long. No matter how much he tried to forget about it, he couldn't.

The guilt and sense of betrayal was overwhelming. But every once in a
while he'd hear that soothing voice, within himself, trying to reassure
him:

"Joe, don't worry about it. You aren't the first doctor to sleep with
one of his patients and you won't be the last. And you're single. Let it
go. "

However, invariably the other voice would bring him back to reality:

"But, Joe, you're a veterinarian!

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JOKE OF THE DAY
----------------
As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the
health zone by sharing a hearty laugh. A variety of jokes that are
ludicrous and trivial, witty and wacky, spontaneous and sportive.
Wishing you a laugh riot.

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WORTH READING
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Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

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18++ 10 Oct 2007

Three couples, an elderly couple, a middle aged couple and a young
newlywed couple wanted to join a church. The pastor says, "We have
special requirements for new parishioners. You must abstain from having
sex for two weeks."

The couples agreed and came back at the end of two weeks. The pastor
goes to the elderly couple and asks, "Were you able to abstain from sex
for the two weeks?" The old man replies, "No problem at all, Pastor."
"Congratulations! Welcome to the church." said the pastor.

The pastor goes to the middle aged couple and asks, "Well, were you able
to abstain from sex for the two weeks?" The man replied, "The first week
was not too bad. The second week I had to sleep on the couch for a
couple of nights but, yes we made it." "Congratulations! Welcome to the
church." said the pastor.

The pastor then goes to the newlywed couple and asks, `Well, were you
able to abstain from sex for two weeks?" "Well Pastor, we were not able
to go without sex for the two weeks" the young man replied. "What
Happened?" inquired the pastor.

"My wife was reaching for a can of corn on the top shelf and dropped it.
When she bent over to pick it up, I was over come with lust and took
advantage of her right there."

"You understand of course, this means you will not be welcome in our
church", stated the pastor.

"That`s OK", said the young man, "We`re not welcome at Kroger anymore
either.

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As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the
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Wishing you a laugh riot.

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WORTH READING
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of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
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18++ 9 Oct 2007

Some Good News and Some Bad News

A soldier goes into the hospital for surgery after being wounded in
battle.

Waking up from the anesthesia he sees his doctor standing at his
bedside. "So tell me Doc, what did you do to me?"

The doctor says, "Son, we have some good news and some bad news."

"Yeah, what?" replies the patient.

"Well the good news is that we were able to save your private parts."

"Yes, that is good news Doc, but what about the bad news?"

"We put them under your pillow!"

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JOKE OF THE DAY
----------------
As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the
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Wishing you a laugh riot.

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WORTH READING
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Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

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18++ 8 Oct 2007

A Huge Paul McCartney Fan

A lady was a huge Paul MCCartney fan and wanted a tattoo of him on the
inside of her thigh. She went to the parlour and told the guy what she
wanted.

He says: "OK, take your skirt and underwear off and sit in the chair
with your legs apart".

She did that and he started on the tattoo. Pretty soon he's done, blows
off the dust and admires his work.

"Who the heck's that?" she says. "It's Paul McCartney", he replies.

"Doesn't look like him at all" says she. "Now get it right or I'll
report you".

So the tattooist starts on the other thigh. Really trying hard to do a
better job. Finally he's done, blows off the dust and feels pretty good.

The woman is pissed off "No way that's Paul Mccartney" she says. "It
bloody well is" says the man. "Listen I'll get a second opinion"

He goes out of his store and grabs the first person he sees. The guy is
a drunk who's been stumbling along the sidewalk. The tattooist drags the
drunk into his store. There's the woman, sitting legs apart with nothing
on below her waist.

The tattoist says to the drunk (pointing at the womans legs)... "Tell me
who the hell you think that is".

The drunk says (in a drunken slur voice), "I've no idea who the people
are on her thighs but the guy in the middle is a dead ringer for Willie
Nelson"!

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JOKE OF THE DAY
----------------
As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the
health zone by sharing a hearty laugh. A variety of jokes that are
ludicrous and trivial, witty and wacky, spontaneous and sportive.
Wishing you a laugh riot.

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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

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18++ 5 Oct 2007

Artificial Insemination

A man buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool. After several
weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant, and calls
a veterinarian for help. The vet tells him that he should try artificial
insemination.

The guy doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting
to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the
sheep are pregnant. The vet tells him that they will stop standing
around and will instead lay down and wallow in the grass when they are
pregnant.

The man hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion
that artificial insemination means HE has to impregnate the sheep. So,
he loads the sheep into his truck, drives them out into the woods, has
sex with them all, brings them back and goes to bed.

Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep. Seeing that they are
all still standing around, he concludes that the first try didn't take,
and loads them in the truck again.

He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good
measure, brings them back and goes to bed. The next morning he wakes to
find the sheep still just standing around.

One more try, he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up and drive
them out to the woods. He spends all day shagging the sheep and, upon
returning home, falls listlessly into bed.

The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look at
the sheep. He asks his wife to look out and tell him if the sheep are
laying in the grass.

"No," she says, "they're all in the truck and one of them is honking the
horn."

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JOKE OF THE DAY
----------------
As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the
health zone by sharing a hearty laugh. A variety of jokes that are
ludicrous and trivial, witty and wacky, spontaneous and sportive.
Wishing you a laugh riot.

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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @

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18++ 4 Oct 2007

The Research Grant

A small rural town had one of the highest birth rates in the country and
this phenomenon attracted the attention of the sociologists at the state
university. So, they wrote a grant proposal; got a huge chunk of
money; moved to town; set up their computers; got squared away; and
began designing their questionnaires and such.

While the staff was busy getting ready for their big research effort,
the project director decided to go to the local diner for a cup of
coffee. He sat down at the counter, ordered his coffee, and while he was
drinking it, he told the owner what his purpose was in town, then asked
him if he had any idea why the birth rate was so high.

"Sure," said the owner of the diner. "Every morning the six o'clock
train comes through here and blows for the crossing. It wakes everybody
up, and, well, it's too late to go back to sleep, and it's too early to
get up."

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from great leaders.

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JOKE OF THE DAY
----------------
As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the
health zone by sharing a hearty laugh. A variety of jokes that are
ludicrous and trivial, witty and wacky, spontaneous and sportive.
Wishing you a laugh riot.

Join the Joke of the Day mailing list @

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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @

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Best Wishes and Regards,
Chirag
:c )

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18++ 3 Oct 2007

Why E-mail Is Like A Penis
Eleven Reasons Why E-mail is Like a Penis:

11.Those who have it would be devastated if it were ever cut off.

10.Those who have it think that those who don't are somehow inferior.

9. Those who don't have it may agree that it's neat, but think it's not
worth the fuss that those who have it make about it.

8. Many of those who don't have it would like to try it, a phenomenon
psychologists call "e-mail Envy."

7. It's more fun when it's up, but this makes it hard to get any real
work done.

6. In the distant past, its only purpose was to transmit information
vital to the survival of the species. Some people still think that's the
only thing it should be used for, but most folks today use it mostly for
fun.

5. If you don't take proper precautions, it can spread viruses.

4. If you use it too much, you'll find it becomes more and more
difficult to think coherently.

3. We attach an importance to it that is far greater than its actual
size and influence warrant.

2. If you're not careful what you do with it, it can get you into a lot
of trouble. And the number one reason Why e-mail is Like a Penis...

1. If you play with it too much, you go blind.

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from great leaders.

Join the Quote A Day mailing list @

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JOKE OF THE DAY
----------------
As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the
health zone by sharing a hearty laugh. A variety of jokes that are
ludicrous and trivial, witty and wacky, spontaneous and sportive.
Wishing you a laugh riot.

Join the Joke of the Day mailing list @

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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @

http://groups-beta.google.com/group/WorthReading
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Best Wishes and Regards,
Chirag
:c )

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18++ 1 Oct 2007

A young lady had just visited her doctor, and he informed her that she
was pregnant. The young lady had been married for ten years and had
wanted a baby very badly. As she sat on the bus, on her way home, she
felt that she had to share her good news with someone. The gentleman
sitting next to her seemed as good as anyone to share the good news
with.

"Sir," she said, "I just received the best news you could ever imagine.
I have to share it with someone, or I'll bust." She told him the news
that the doctor had told her about being pregnant.

The man shared her enthusiasm as she shared his experience. He said he
was a farmer, and he had trouble with his hens laying eggs. He stated
that he went out to the hen house one morning and all of his hens had
laid eggs. He was so happy, he added, "But, i did change the cocks."

The newly pregnant woman responded, "Confidentially,... me, too."

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They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone.
But they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen
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from great leaders.

Join the Quote A Day mailing list @

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JOKE OF THE DAY
----------------
As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the
health zone by sharing a hearty laugh. A variety of jokes that are
ludicrous and trivial, witty and wacky, spontaneous and sportive.
Wishing you a laugh riot.

Join the Joke of the Day mailing list @

http://groups-beta.google.com/group/JokeOfTheDay
Or simply go Blogging @
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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @

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