Monday, September 28, 2009

18++ 29 Sep 2009

Sister Sister
A little girl says, "Daddy, I wish I had a little sister." Trying to
be funny, the daddy says, "Honey, you do have a sister." "I do?"
questions the confused youngster. "Sure," responds the dad, "You just
don't see her because when you are coming in the front door, she is
always leaving through the back door." The little girl gave this a few
moments thought and remarked, "You mean like my other Daddy does?"
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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
--------------------
They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone. But
they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen gems from
the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings from great
leaders.

Join the Quote A Day mailing list @
   
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Or simply Blog it @    
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JOKE OF THE DAY
----------------
As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the health
zone by sharing a hearty laugh. A variety of jokes that are ludicrous and
trivial, witty and wacky, spontaneous and sportive. Wishing you a laugh
riot.

Join the Joke of the Day mailing list @
   
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Or simply go Blogging @   
 
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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words of
wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your chance to
question the priorities of existence and also to get their answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
   
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Thursday, September 17, 2009

18++ 18 Sep 2009

Service With a Smile
 
One should remember that calling 9-1-1 is
sometimes a public service, done for the benefit of others... That in
mind, Jasper makes his call: "There's a woman over here doing some
yard work in a thong bikini." "Sir," said the exasperated dispatcher,
"9-1-1 is an emergency number. What do you expect the police to do about
a woman in a thong bikini?" "Nothing," answered Jasper. "I just
thought you fellows would like to know."
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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
--------------------
They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone. But
they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen gems from
the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings from great
leaders.

Join the Quote A Day mailing list @
   
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/QuotationOfTheDay
Or simply Blog it @    
http://quotationoftheday.blogspot.com/

JOKE OF THE DAY
----------------
As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the health
zone by sharing a hearty laugh. A variety of jokes that are ludicrous and
trivial, witty and wacky, spontaneous and sportive. Wishing you a laugh
riot.

Join the Joke of the Day mailing list @
   
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/JokeOfTheDay
Or simply go Blogging @   
 
http://joketimefolks.blogspot.com/

WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words of
wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your chance to
question the priorities of existence and also to get their answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
   
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/WorthReading
Or simply go Blogging @   
 
http://readingtimefolks.blogspot.com/

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

18++

Drunk & Hallucinating "I'm going to give up this drinking," Doug said
to his friend Bill. "I got so drunk last night that I just barely
staggered home and managed to drag myself up the stairs to the bedroom."
"So what's so bad about that?" his friend Bill asked. "The bad part is
I'm starting to have hallucinations," stated Doug. "What do you mean?"
asked Bill. "Well, when I opened the bedroom door," said Doug, "I
found that I was already in bed making love to my wife!"------------------------------------------------------------------
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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
--------------------
They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone. But
they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen gems from
the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings from great
leaders.

Join the Quote A Day mailing list @
   
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/QuotationOfTheDay
Or simply Blog it @    
http://quotationoftheday.blogspot.com/

JOKE OF THE DAY
----------------
As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the health
zone by sharing a hearty laugh. A variety of jokes that are ludicrous and
trivial, witty and wacky, spontaneous and sportive. Wishing you a laugh
riot.

Join the Joke of the Day mailing list @
   
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/JokeOfTheDay
Or simply go Blogging @   
 
http://joketimefolks.blogspot.com/

WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words of
wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your chance to
question the priorities of existence and also to get their answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
   
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/WorthReading
Or simply go Blogging @   
 
http://readingtimefolks.blogspot.com/

Sunday, September 13, 2009

18++ 14 Sep 2009

Church Bulletin Bloopers
 
~ The ladies of the church have cast off
clothing of every kind and they may be seen in the church basement on
Friday. ~ A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church
hall. Music will follow. ~ Tuesday at 4:00 pm there will be an ice
cream social. All ladies giving milk will please come early. ~ For
those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery
downstairs.
~ This afternoon there will be a meeting in the South and North ends of
the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.

~ Wednesday, the ladies Liturgy Society will meet. Mrs. Jones will sing
"Put Me in My Little Bed" accompanied by the pastor.
 
~ Thursday at 5:00 pm there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers
Club. All wishing to become little mothers, please see the minister in
his study.

~ Next Sunday a special collection will be taken to defray the cost of
the new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the new carpet will
come forward and do so.

~ At the evening service tonight, the topic will be "What is Hell?".
Come early and listen to our choir practice.

~ This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and
lay an egg on the altar.

~ Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.

~ Thursday night, potluck supper. Prayer and medication to follow.

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ALSO PLAYING AT A MAILING LIST NEAR YOU ::

QUOTATION OF THE DAY
--------------------
They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone. But
they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen gems from
the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings from great
leaders.

Join the Quote A Day mailing list @
   
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/QuotationOfTheDay
Or simply Blog it @    
http://quotationoftheday.blogspot.com/

JOKE OF THE DAY
----------------
As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the health
zone by sharing a hearty laugh. A variety of jokes that are ludicrous and
trivial, witty and wacky, spontaneous and sportive. Wishing you a laugh
riot.

Join the Joke of the Day mailing list @
   
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/JokeOfTheDay
Or simply go Blogging @   
 
http://joketimefolks.blogspot.com/

WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words of
wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your chance to
question the priorities of existence and also to get their answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
   
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/WorthReading
Or simply go Blogging @   
 
http://readingtimefolks.blogspot.com/

18++ 14 Sep 2009

Church Bulletin Bloopers
 
~ The ladies of the church have cast off
clothing of every kind and they may be seen in the church basement on
Friday. ~ A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church
hall. Music will follow. ~ Tuesday at 4:00 pm there will be an ice
cream social. All ladies giving milk will please come early. ~ For
those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery
downstairs.
~ This afternoon there will be a meeting in the South and North ends of
the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.

~ Wednesday, the ladies Liturgy Society will meet. Mrs. Jones will sing
"Put Me in My Little Bed" accompanied by the pastor.
 
~ Thursday at 5:00 pm there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers
Club. All wishing to become little mothers, please see the minister in
his study.

~ Next Sunday a special collection will be taken to defray the cost of
the new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the new carpet will
come forward and do so.

~ At the evening service tonight, the topic will be "What is Hell?".
Come early and listen to our choir practice.

~ This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and
lay an egg on the altar.

~ Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.

~ Thursday night, potluck supper. Prayer and medication to follow.

------------------------------------------------------------------
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ALSO PLAYING AT A MAILING LIST NEAR YOU ::

QUOTATION OF THE DAY
--------------------
They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone. But
they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen gems from
the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings from great
leaders.

Join the Quote A Day mailing list @
   
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/QuotationOfTheDay
Or simply Blog it @    
http://quotationoftheday.blogspot.com/

JOKE OF THE DAY
----------------
As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the health
zone by sharing a hearty laugh. A variety of jokes that are ludicrous and
trivial, witty and wacky, spontaneous and sportive. Wishing you a laugh
riot.

Join the Joke of the Day mailing list @
   
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/JokeOfTheDay
Or simply go Blogging @   
 
http://joketimefolks.blogspot.com/

WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words of
wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your chance to
question the priorities of existence and also to get their answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
   
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/WorthReading
Or simply go Blogging @   
 
http://readingtimefolks.blogspot.com/

Sunday, September 06, 2009

18++ 7 Sep 2009

Many Funny Letters to Dear Abby
 
Dear Abby: Do you think about dying
much? Abby: No, that's the last thing I'd want to do. ----------
Dear Abby: I've been going steady with this man for six years. We see
each other every night. He says he loves me, and I know I love him, but
he never mentions marriage. Do you think he's going out with me just for
what he can get? Abby: I don't know. What's he getting? ----------
Dear Abby: When you are being introduced, is it all right to say, "I've
heard a lot about you?" Abby: Depends on what you've heard! 
Dear Abby: My boyfriend is going to be twenty years old
next month. I'd like to give him something nice for his birthday. What
do you think he'd like? Abby: Never mind what he'd like. Give him a
tie.
Dear Abby: Are birth control pills Tax Deductible? Abby:
Only if they don't work!
Dear Abby: Our son was married
in January. Five months later his wife had a ten-pound baby girl. They
said the baby was premature. Tell me, can a baby this big be that early?
Abby: The baby was on time, the wedding was late. Forget it!
Dear Abby: Is it possible for a man to be in love with two women at the
same time? Abby: Sure it's possible! It is both possible and
hazardous.
Dear Abby: I joined the Navy to see the world. I've seen it. Now,
how do I get out? Abby: Simple. Go to your superior officer and say
these 2 words: I'm Gay.
Dear Abby: I have always wanted
to have my family history traced, but I can't afford to spend a lot of
money to do it. Any suggestions? Abby: Yes, try out for American Idol
Dear Abby: What's the difference between a wife and a mistress? Abby: Night and
Day!
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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
--------------------
They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone. But
they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen gems from
the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings from great
leaders.

Join the Quote A Day mailing list @
   
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/QuotationOfTheDay
Or simply Blog it @    
http://quotationoftheday.blogspot.com/

JOKE OF THE DAY
----------------
As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the health
zone by sharing a hearty laugh. A variety of jokes that are ludicrous and
trivial, witty and wacky, spontaneous and sportive. Wishing you a laugh
riot.

Join the Joke of the Day mailing list @
   
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/JokeOfTheDay
Or simply go Blogging @   
 
http://joketimefolks.blogspot.com/

WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words of
wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your chance to
question the priorities of existence and also to get their answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
   
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/WorthReading
Or simply go Blogging @   
 
http://readingtimefolks.blogspot.com/