18++ 30 Nov 2009

Emotionally Charged

 

During a meeting at our church one Sunday, a
parishioner was speaking about an emotionally charged topic and had
trouble controlling her tears... Finishing her remarks, she told the
congregation, "I apologize for crying so much. I'm usually not such a
big boob." The bishop rose to close the session and remarked, "That's
okay. We like big boobs."
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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
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They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone. But
they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen gems from
the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings from great
leaders.

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JOKE OF THE DAY
----------------
As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the health
zone by sharing a hearty laugh. A variety of jokes that are ludicrous and
trivial, witty and wacky, spontaneous and sportive. Wishing you a laugh
riot.

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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words of
wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your chance to
question the priorities of existence and also to get their answers.

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18++ 27 Nov 2009

Two Hobbits

 

Two hobbits walk into a bar where one of them picks up a
barfly. They take her to a local motel... The first hobbit goes into
the motel room while the other waits outside. Once the door closes,
the hobbit on the outside hears starnge noises through the door, "I
can't do it, I can't do it!" In the morning, the second hobbit askes
the first, "How did it go?" The first one answers. "It was
embarrassing. I simply couldn't do it." The second hobbit shook his
head. "Performance issues?" "No," explains the first hobbit. "I
couldnt get on the bed!"

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They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone. But
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JOKE OF THE DAY
----------------
As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the health
zone by sharing a hearty laugh. A variety of jokes that are ludicrous and
trivial, witty and wacky, spontaneous and sportive. Wishing you a laugh
riot.

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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words of
wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your chance to
question the priorities of existence and also to get their answers.

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18++ 25 Nov 2009

Ten Signs Your Life Is About To Change

 

10. The bank notifies you that your paycheck
has bounced.

9. While watching the news, you spot your spouse marching
in a Gay Pride parade.

8. You hear that your dentist has been arrested
for using radioactive material in tooth-fillings.

7. While driving in the center lane of a highway on a densely foggy morning you suddenly run
out of gas.

6. You ask your doctor for a physical and he replies, "I'm
sorry, I dont do autopsies."

5. The FBI names you as "a person of interest" in the investigation.

4. While surfing some .gov websites, you suddenly get
the following diaglogue box: "ICBM launch successful.

3. The IRS invites you to a
weenie-roast and the invitation begins with: "Dear Weenie...".
2. You notice a bulldozer and a crew of men in HAZMAT suits in the
vacant house next door.

 

And the Surest sign you're life is about to
change in a major way...

1. Your fourteen-year-old daughter suddenly
develops a craving for pickles and ice cream.

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They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone. But
they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen gems from
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leaders.

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JOKE OF THE DAY
----------------
As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the health
zone by sharing a hearty laugh. A variety of jokes that are ludicrous and
trivial, witty and wacky, spontaneous and sportive. Wishing you a laugh
riot.

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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words of
wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your chance to
question the priorities of existence and also to get their answers.

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18++ 9 Nov 2009

Bartender Barb

 

Morris, the not-so-swift bumkin, walked into a bar and
ordered a beer. The bartender looked at Morris and said, "Have you seen
Eileen?" Morris was really confused and asked, "Eileen who?" "I lean
over and you kiss my butt!" replied the bartender. Well, Morris was
offended by this and walked out the door and into the bar across the
street. So he sat down and ordered a beer. While he was drinking his
beer he told the bartender what the other bartender said to him. The
bartender then told him, "You know what you should do? You should go
back over there and ask him if he has seen Ben, and when he says Ben
who, you say I bend over and you kiss my butt." So Morris goes back
across the street and asked the Bartender if he had seen Ben. The
Bartender said, "Yep, He just went out the door with Eileen." "Eileen
who?" asked Morris

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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
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They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone. But
they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen gems from
the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings from great
leaders.

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Or simply Blog it @    
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JOKE OF THE DAY
----------------
As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the health
zone by sharing a hearty laugh. A variety of jokes that are ludicrous and
trivial, witty and wacky, spontaneous and sportive. Wishing you a laugh
riot.

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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words of
wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your chance to
question the priorities of existence and also to get their answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
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18++ 4 Nov 2009

Love Stamps

 

After I recovered from surgery, my family suggested that I write Thank You
notes to everyone who sent gifts and cards. I agreed that this would
be a nice idea, and I asked my daughter to buy several books of 'Love'
stamps at the post office. Upon returning, my daughter said, "I had to
slap the clerk at the post office!" "Why did you need to do that?!!!"
I exclaimed. "Well," explained my daughter, "I asked him for books of
Love stamps, but the clerk told me they were out of books. And all he
could give me was 'Love' in the sheets!"
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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
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They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone. But
they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen gems from
the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings from great
leaders.

Join the Quote A Day mailing list @
    http://groups-beta.google.com/group/QuotationOfTheDay
Or simply Blog it @    
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JOKE OF THE DAY
----------------
As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the health
zone by sharing a hearty laugh. A variety of jokes that are ludicrous and
trivial, witty and wacky, spontaneous and sportive. Wishing you a laugh
riot.

Join the Joke of the Day mailing list @
    http://groups-beta.google.com/group/JokeOfTheDay
Or simply go Blogging @   
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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words of
wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your chance to
question the priorities of existence and also to get their answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
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18++ 4 Nov 2009

Love Stamps

 

After I recovered from surgery, my family suggested that I write Thank You
notes to everyone who sent gifts and cards. I agreed that this would
be a nice idea, and I asked my daughter to buy several books of 'Love'
stamps at the post office. Upon returning, my daughter said, "I had to
slap the clerk at the post office!" "Why did you need to do that?!!!"
I exclaimed. "Well," explained my daughter, "I asked him for books of
Love stamps, but the clerk told me they were out of books. And all he
could give me was 'Love' in the sheets!"
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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
--------------------
They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone. But
they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen gems from
the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings from great
leaders.

Join the Quote A Day mailing list @
    http://groups-beta.google.com/group/QuotationOfTheDay
Or simply Blog it @    
http://quotationoftheday.blogspot.com/

JOKE OF THE DAY
----------------
As wise men say, a joke a day keeps the doctor away. So step into the health
zone by sharing a hearty laugh. A variety of jokes that are ludicrous and
trivial, witty and wacky, spontaneous and sportive. Wishing you a laugh
riot.

Join the Joke of the Day mailing list @
    http://groups-beta.google.com/group/JokeOfTheDay
Or simply go Blogging @   
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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words of
wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your chance to
question the priorities of existence and also to get their answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
    http://groups-beta.google.com/group/WorthReading
Or simply go Blogging @   
 http://readingtimefolks.blogspot.com/